Mystical Mundane

My chair is important. I sit in it, it supports my weight, and I rest. I sit in this chair while eating dinner, or while at the laptop or when studying and writing. A lot of work went into that chair. It is part of my dining room table and it is wood, with engravings along the back. Much like most other dining room tables. Does knowing where the chair come from and how it is made affect it's usefulness? Not particularly. It is strong, relatively comfortable and therefore serves its purpose. I find recently that this applies to my Gnostic studies. The purpose of my chair is for sitting. The purpose of Gnosticism is to bring about Gnosis. Isn't it? Yeah, it's somewhat simplified, but enough things in life are complicated. I'm simplifying where it seems appropriate. I've spent time doing what feels like putting square pegs in round holes. I've been quite pre-occupied learning about the different Gnostic groups, Gnostic Myths, Gnostic Communities.... Trying to find ...

William Cranna House Home is where the heart is. We raise children (two legged AND four legged ;) ), we make memories, we make it our own. Sure, making enough money so that we can HAVE that home is important, but the job itself shouldn't really matter. Does it allow us to have a roof over our head and food in our bellies? Good enough. It's not the size of the home, but the amount of love we put into it.

Going to the eye doctor today to finally update a prescription for glasses. I haven't worn glasses in about 15 years, but it's becoming quite evident I need to wear them again. As for meds, still figuring out the correct dose of Strattera. Was up at 40mg but felt more of the actual side effects than any benefits. So, back down to 25 for now. Tomorrow I'll add in a 10mg, bringing it to 35. Zoloft is down to one 25mg every fourth day. I still really feel the SSRI withdrawal effects by the third day. Spiritually, still trying to find my place. I've felt quite separated from God the past little while. Knowing He is ever present, but unable to find that feeling of 'connected'. I think it has alot to do with the fact that the two youngest kids have been getting noisier and noiser and the only silent time I have to myself these days is at about 11pm, when they are finally both sound asleep and all the chaos of the day is half-assedly put away in containers , boxes and ...